4.27.2011

Kindrid Spirits

What does it mean to be a man after God’s own heart?
Well, let’s begin with the mystery that I was chosen from the start
God knew me and loved me before the creation of the world
Born as a beloved little boy and not as a girl
My surroundings were decided, and absolutely not my first choice
But all the events in my life – good and bad -- pushed me to heed to His Voice
The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, honesty is another key
To obey and be blessed is the formula to be who I was meant to be
It’s not always easy when God gives and takes away
Especially with the loss, grief is attached to those days
So why do I continue? I could just give up
And ask repeatedly, like Jesus, please remove this cup
Of suffering, strife, loneliness, and pain
Another nail, another cross, are you kidding? This is insane!
Will it ever end? Will I get a reprieve?
That’s part of the package, this is what I receive
But I could settle and make my dreams come true
But many times those things aren’t holy and cause me to walk away from You
So I look to the hills to which my help comes from
Falling to my knees, I confess, help ne before my soul goes numb
I don’t want to grow callous and my conscious disappear
Grow cold, hardened, hateful -- just admit my spirit thirsts like the deer
I know and have tasted that the Lord is good
So there will be times I may find myself misunderstood
Called to do things that go against the grain
Following God means leaving others behind, to die is gain
Their approval, acceptance can become my idols
I cry out to the Lord Jesus, please help me to break out of those cycles
Co-dendency, enmeshment, manipulation and abuse
Can suck the life out of me, take way my juice
To encourage, speak life, give hope to the lost
Be a friend or a brother– good like your favorite steak sauce
So realize there’s more growth, nothing’s “run of the mill”
I desire clean hands and a pure heart to enter the Lord’s holy hill
So no more deceit, there must be character and integrity
If I hope to be like King David and honor the Trinity
God will not tolerate me looking to worship another god
Anything in the sea or heaven, or someone with a great bod
Reminiscing of all the wrong I’ve done, this is my lament
Repentance begins when I rend my heart, and not my garment
Since I am called by Your Name, humble myself and pray
You will hear from Heaven and restore me, that’s the Truth You say
So I am depending on You, I want to abide in Your presence
May Your Spirit encompass me, may it penetrate all of my essence

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I too am in a transformation. My heart yearns for Gods guidance into this Journey here on earth. I seek him with my whole heart. Learning that I must be still in order to hear him. I pray the prayer of Jabez, for I seek his wisdom for his blessing on my life in him and what a huge request to ask of him, to enlarge my territory. I ask him daily, "What can I do to serve you today?" sometimes i cannot hear him answer. I desperately seek a closer and more meaningful relationship with him!! I must repent and always ask for his forgiveness on a daily basis. I know that I can shine his light and guide others to him for I have done this. Now I am in this place (not sure what to even call it) I will follow you on this Diary of a Saved Man. I do not even know why when I tyed in "God Help me" why this page came up. I do know that God is trying to tell me something. God Bless! Dee in Phoenix